God that was a hard read, but nothing as hard as for you to write or to bare and live with….. I feel ignorant and ashamed that I haven’t informed myself better, especially after reading what you have to contend with, research, understand, decide, ignore and bare and bare and bare. You’re a titan Ms Skelton, a bad ass, wisdom keeper, and phoenix of epic proportions. I love you and am by your side. Every muddy messy step of it!!!!! 💚
Thank you Helen for your series . They are all informative and written with your customary eloquence. Thank you for your bravery and honesty. Bloody love you x
Thank you Helen - so so many great points. And really resonated with - that we don’t get to experience retirement. So many of us delay certain gratifications because we are preparing for this later period of our lives. Starting to imagine all the things we will do when we are free of mortgages and childcare/elderly P responsibilities. And laying the foundation for that by working hard. That’s the reward - for all of our sacrifices. And that is taken away from us.
Also when we are making a case for our right to life extending drugs - have you noticed how we emphasise our importance as care givers? And of course - that is important - carers/ mothers role.
But it is as if our main worth is related solely to this role. Makes me sometimes want to scream: fuck this ‘mother dying’ - it’s a tragedy for me - to be robbed of my career - the things I love- people I love. Of my simple desire to get old.
Also it’s strange how you spend years trying to be at one - and live in balance with your body, accept and love it. But then it goes rogue. Over runs with cancerous mutations. So now you have to try somehow to find mental peace while a war in your body rages. Soon I will have chemo bombs going off. I will feel poisoned 🤮 from the hair falling from my head - to my toes. Which is a horrible prolonged feeling. I know every one detests the phrase ‘battle with cancer’. But that does seem to adequately describe this body of mine that has gone into self destruct mode.
I wonder - How can this be part of mother natures plan? I grew up believing we got to live longer - on account of us being so important to the next generation. And yet 1 in 7 will get this. So yes that’s my musings prompted by your thoughts🙏
PS. I’m about to reread a great book by Barbara Ehrenreich: Natural causes - life, Death and the Illusion of control. Think that will help with my pursuit of peace. 🙂Xlee
Thank you SO much for this Lee, and so many yesses to all of it. To be robbed of so much, and to have to endure so much - I know what you’re facing right now is mountainous.
So many of us live blithely with so many assumptions about what is going to happen to us - and are encouraged to do so I think, not by anyone in particular but by a society terrified of facing the reality of death. And here we are, proof of that untruth, and trying to make sense of that.
God that was a hard read, but nothing as hard as for you to write or to bare and live with….. I feel ignorant and ashamed that I haven’t informed myself better, especially after reading what you have to contend with, research, understand, decide, ignore and bare and bare and bare. You’re a titan Ms Skelton, a bad ass, wisdom keeper, and phoenix of epic proportions. I love you and am by your side. Every muddy messy step of it!!!!! 💚
🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡 couldn’t love you more.
Thank you Helen for your series . They are all informative and written with your customary eloquence. Thank you for your bravery and honesty. Bloody love you x
Bloody love you right back xxx
Thank you Helen - so so many great points. And really resonated with - that we don’t get to experience retirement. So many of us delay certain gratifications because we are preparing for this later period of our lives. Starting to imagine all the things we will do when we are free of mortgages and childcare/elderly P responsibilities. And laying the foundation for that by working hard. That’s the reward - for all of our sacrifices. And that is taken away from us.
Also when we are making a case for our right to life extending drugs - have you noticed how we emphasise our importance as care givers? And of course - that is important - carers/ mothers role.
But it is as if our main worth is related solely to this role. Makes me sometimes want to scream: fuck this ‘mother dying’ - it’s a tragedy for me - to be robbed of my career - the things I love- people I love. Of my simple desire to get old.
Also it’s strange how you spend years trying to be at one - and live in balance with your body, accept and love it. But then it goes rogue. Over runs with cancerous mutations. So now you have to try somehow to find mental peace while a war in your body rages. Soon I will have chemo bombs going off. I will feel poisoned 🤮 from the hair falling from my head - to my toes. Which is a horrible prolonged feeling. I know every one detests the phrase ‘battle with cancer’. But that does seem to adequately describe this body of mine that has gone into self destruct mode.
I wonder - How can this be part of mother natures plan? I grew up believing we got to live longer - on account of us being so important to the next generation. And yet 1 in 7 will get this. So yes that’s my musings prompted by your thoughts🙏
PS. I’m about to reread a great book by Barbara Ehrenreich: Natural causes - life, Death and the Illusion of control. Think that will help with my pursuit of peace. 🙂Xlee
Thank you SO much for this Lee, and so many yesses to all of it. To be robbed of so much, and to have to endure so much - I know what you’re facing right now is mountainous.
So many of us live blithely with so many assumptions about what is going to happen to us - and are encouraged to do so I think, not by anyone in particular but by a society terrified of facing the reality of death. And here we are, proof of that untruth, and trying to make sense of that.
I’m going to order the book right away.
Thank you, and so much love to you xxxx